just another random saturday

have tonnes of pictures to upload yet i cant find ka fai's cable..
damn..

a lot of things to say. but dont really know where to start
point form, do you mind? ( haha... you dont have a choice, dontcha?)

(in no particular order)

- i met Prof. Robert Burden to talk about my intention to further
my studies in uk. he's a very kind scholar,
gave alot of insights and advice to me..
which university will be an ideal place for my study,
which programme i can consider venturing in.
gave him my resume and personal profile, he's quite impressed.
now im still waiting to further contact with him,
and waiting for the decision of my superiors..
sounds interesting huh?--->
though nothing has been confirmed YET.
now im making myself clear here..
so.. try to refrain from asking me when i'll be leaving.
i wish to know too.
but i know im still fighting for something i long for since so long
i hope somehow> hope will find a way.

no im not counting the eggs before they're hatched.
im just praying, wishing, and still emitting positive frequency to the universe.
will work, kononnya.

- i dyed my hair again.
at 1st i opted for a greenish-ashey-almond-coloured-kinda-blonde.
like the caucasians, not so much golden blonde.
it's the middle of being a brunnete and a blonde, in a greyish shade.
understand?
doubt you can conprehend what im trying to say.
anyways....
my hairstylist commented that, that colour will washed away very soon.
he recommended my to dye my hair into blue 1st ( yes, blue)
and then let it wash off to turn into the exact colour i adore.

1st thing: dye my hair blue? (it's not like bluish-black mind you. it's BLUE!

2nd : im not sure my boss can tolerate such a disturbing hair colour of his subordinate,
not to mention when our clients are STUDENTS. what type of role model im playing?

3rd: my hair is quite long. how can he be sure that when the blue colour wash away, it will be as even, as balance, as throrough, instead of patchy, ill-matched, like disgusting colour run on our garments?

4th. by the time all the blue colour wash off, i think my black roots will start to grow again and become sickenly obvious.

haha.. thus in the end. i decided to just dye this colour straight.
who cares when the colour doesnt last, it will still turn into something brownish which is viewable and acceptable for me.
i am dreadfully wanting to show off my new hair colour yet.. i still cant find that damn cable.
maybe next time.

i've slimmed down but that was long before i wrote this entry.
damnit. i was so confident and feeling light previously.
can you believe it.. my humongous gigantic elephant-ly thighs were "sliced" into digestably thin pair of legs.. yes. im serious.
i went jogging with darl, and trekking (okay, only once).. and most important of all,
i skipped carbo-riched food especially for dinner. thus i was obviously toned down.
mummy, my roommates, dear yunyun and my darling can be my witness..

now.. coming back to here-and-now.
i've blown back into original size liao.
damn those yummy delicious cuisines,
damn the weather,
damn everything,
damn boredomness (when im bored, i eat)
damn happiness (when im happy, i eat too)
damn politics
damn education
damn fast food
damn junk food
damn desserts
damn fathers and mothers day,
damn birthday celebration of my two little brothers.
i can still think of an infinity list of things which i can damn for!

im now FAT!!!!

hmm.. hopefully by the time i can show you guys my picture,
i can cut down my weight again...
sob sob ... i really miss my small thigh...
miss the day where i can flash my legs in shorts with my head held high.


a friend of mine went through something that devastates her.
it was a heartache to see someone you love and care, get "bullied" and hurt by other morons.
thus, my maternal instinct suddenly glow and grow.
now she's standing strong after the rain and storm.
pray that she'l love herself more after all these years.
i personally thinks that she's of high qualities that some damn fools doesn deserve her. thus,
to hell stupid ignorant fools.
get your dirty hands off her.

as she's pure and with dignity,
she deserve someone better. whom will show very-very-the-soon.

(somehow i got a feeling if she's reading this, she'll be pissed off cos i have not get her consent,
bla bla... at least im not announcing your name what.. you let me blog la..im short of blogging material plzzz)


i watched - night in the museum and angels and demons.
my verdict: love it... love demons more..


i have better skin liao!!!
im so happy i wanna shout to the world.
previously i was cursed by never-ending-popping-out-of zits
after considering for long, and trying numerous products that claim-to-be effective.
a colleague of mine, miss E recommend me this..

though it's an OUCH! to my pocket, it is marvelous!!!!
now i have better complexion. serious.
but im committed (or say, motivated and reinforced) to use it's product continuously.
if you wanna know.. ask me ask me.

yao also mentioned that i have glowing clean and clear skin now.
muahahahahaahaahahaahaha to hell pimples!!! i've diminished you stupid!

my cousin is getting married this july.
i am trilled! happy and excited!!
she's of same age with me:) we somehow played together when we were quite small,
attended the same kindergarten and primary school.
now she's getting married. i had a lot of mixed feelings...
happy for her.. and also reflecting on my own destiny.
is what i want in life too much? will it be more comforting to just settle down, start a family.
taking care of my love ones..
in the end of the day, the ultimate goal is still love.
hmm.. i stil need more money, and exposure, and money, and clubs, and money, and dresses, and play, and pink pink stuffs in my room, and money, and brandys, and gucci, and lv, and chanel. ( talking bout chanel, yao mentioned he used to pronounced it as chan-nel.. as in t.v. channel.... haha.. damn funny, after correcting his pronounciation, he's now pronouncing it as xiao niao.... damn (lil' bird: in mandarin)

ooh.. im still too far away from being committed to a lot of responsibilities.
i love babies anyway.
maybe i should consider getting a dog.
and no other dog but cute lil brownish toy poodle that has the magical ability to melt my heart.
yes, sometimes im quite kind hearted. besides being selfish, impatient, grumpy at times.

im dying of thirst and the absence of pleasure.
cos.. most of my friends show off here and there in fb, fr, blog, whateva, their victorious pictures of their beach vacations..
i started off to hint yaoyao that i long for a beach holiday. after sometimes i become more assertive and ask others whether they wanna join. and after sometimes i become aggressive in looking for some tour agents... and after sometimes i gave up.. and after sometimes i began mentioning this to yao a million times a day to yao.. and later on i started to dream of it. and later now im mummering to yao in an unprecievable desibel, a zillion times per day..
damn.
do i need to wait to summit my application to santa in dec?

god.

m i too much?
i've been wanting it for sooo dammmmnnnnnn llllloooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

(stil waiting)
and now my semester starts dy.. after 3 weeks of stretching my neck. now everything is over.
i shall die in dissatisfaction and envy. not wanting to reincarnate.


my classes starts dy. im teaching developmental psychology(lectures and tutorials), as well as intro to psychology (tutorials). stop asking me something like, huh you teach in the college ar? tutor is it? not lecturer la.. > how can you judge my ability by my age ne? if you think a 24 yrs old graduate do not have the ability to be a lecturer, you are very-very-the-wrong. haha and what makes you think a 52 yrs old is more efficient and more able to teach? get my point?

anyway. im just enjoying my work though sometimes im mad busy. our working hours are kinda flexible , maybe one day only 4 hours etc.. yet, you wont know how much effort one is putting behind the scene, when he/she reaches home. we need to be very well prepared in our 2 hour lecture/tutorial. and imagine how to arrange your flow of thought to talk 2 hours nonstop.. this is what im still learning and constantly need to brush up on.

though my way of teaching requires a lot of "cracking-my-brain-to-satisfy-students'-crave-for-fun-learning-activities-and crazy-games", i think every effort worths! hope this contributes to my year-end-bonuses too.... ahem** anyway. the major goal is to keep myself interested, else, my students wont be interested as well. right?

alright im tired after all these ranting..
shall end this with out-of-date-pictures (stored in yao's pc for centuries)


----------------uploading failed.. dont ask me why. at least i'v tried----------------------------
thus, no pictures today. damn damn damn